Sunday, October 25, 2009

How Karl's head is like Big Ten Football

There is a saying that people used to use to describe Big Ten football, "Three yards and a cloud of dust". Now this has somewhat shifted over the last few years with the emergence of spread offenses and coaches named Rodriguez. However, any true Big Ten fan knows that to win in November and December on the road in Iowa you have got to be able to run the ball. The thing about "Three yards and a cloud of dust" is that you don't get anywhere very fast. In fact, there are times when you think to yourself that the offensive coordinator may be taking too many fish oil pills when on 3 and 8 you run a draw play to the fullback. Undoubtedly, this unnamed offensive coordinator would probably respond by saying, "This is big ten football. This is how the game is played". Touche.

At this point you are probably thinking 1) Keith has lost it 2) Did you see Michigan put up nine touchdowns against Delaware State and 3) what does this have to do with Karl? Allow me to systematically address all three of these queries.

1) I ranked Karl's nurses based on their awesomeness. Need I explain this comparison?
2) It was Delaware State. Seriously. It was Delaware State. Karl could rush for a TD against Delaware State.


3) Karl is like Big Ten football because right now we are just plotting along taking what the defense gives us. Honestly, not too much has changed over the past week. He is getting a little stronger each day, and he is able to do a little more each day. But we are not in a position to bomb the ball downfield just yet. We need to soften the defense up a little more first (translation, allow for Karl to fully recover from surgery before he starts radiation).

This whole analogy makes sense to about 17% of you all I'm sure. Sorry.

There has been some continued problems with the incision bleeding. They aren't sure why this is continuing, but as long as it is not the brain it shouldn't be a problem. My mom is calling the doctor's at U of C tomorrow to makes sure that there isn't anything else we should be doing. I talked to Karl today and he said the only thing the doctor told him was to be sure the fluid wasn't clear. Apparently clear fluid could be spinal fluid.

I think that's all for right now. Again, if you would like to visit Karl you can email Kari (our favorite sister, and its not even close) at

PS I'm pretty sure Laurinitas is tackling Mike Hart after a 22 yard gain. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it Buckeye fans. Oh yeah, did anyone ever tell you that your mascot is a poisonous nut and your mascot is tragically named "Brutus" which just so happens to be the same name as the most famous murderer in history?

PPS Karl wanted me to add that "The Red Wings will win" and that Lovey Smith will not be coaches the Bears at seasons end.

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